Merry Christmas

Yes, it's that time of year again, when families get together, punch each other out, go to the beach, punch each other out, drink too much, punch each other out... and so on. Fortunately, my lovely family are not the punching out type... although my brother tried out a few wrestling moves on me which could have had some bad outcomes, except that I know how to make him cry. I am surprisingly tough.

My mother gave me a Country Women's Association Cook book and Handy Hints Guide, 53rd edition, in the hopes that I shall one day be an excellent wife. My sister gave me a tea pot, in the hopes that I shall one day invite her to my place for tea, rather than whisky. My grandfather gave me nothing, but very politely introduced himself to me immediately after assuring me he is cured of dementia. My brother and sister-in-law told me that they "may one day" visit me in London, before shaking their heads at each other when they thought my back was turned.

A good time was had by all.

Anyway, as is our tradition, we had a Christmas lunch, followed by a mass exodus, and then my father, mother and I spent the rest of the afternoon packing (I am going back to London tomorrow and they are coming with me for a holiday) and watching TV, before settling down with a glass of port. My mum is onto her second glass, so this is clearly the craziest day of the year for her.

As they say though.....

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

38 degrees? Bring it on.

Still in Australia, still enjoying the heat and the sun. It's been beautiful :)

ther than lazing about, doing nothing, I took a thrilling trip down South to Busselton. This was really just an excuse to do nothing but go to the beach and lie by the pool. We also went horse riding, which resulted in my sister becoming BFF's with a Perthonality, a natural horsemanship guy who is apparently quite famous in these parts. I couldn't help thinking he is one of those people who was born a hundred years too late. He would ha e enjoyed being a cowboy I think. Have spent the last few days doing noting but my stupid moot work, which has involved me going to my old uni library, which I SWORE never to do again. The mott is forcing me to do all kinds of things I didn't want to do!

I also caught up with some of my old uni friends, in particular Katie who is a BAD INFLUENCE. That's all I'll say about that.

Being at home has made me realise the things I miss and the things I don't miss. I don't miss constant sweating but I do miss the warmth. I don't miss Australian flags on cars, but I do miss the way it smells when it rains. I don't miss the transport system, but I do miss those perfect clear days when the ocean seems to go on forever. I don't miss being surrounded by Australian accents, but I do miss my family (who's Australian accents aren't as bad as everyone else's). So it's a balancing act I suppose.

Going back to London on the 26th, provided that it's not snowing and that Heathrow is open. Not sure what I'm hoping for in that sense...

Home sweet home

24 hours and four movies later, I'm back at casa familia enjoying sunshine and remembering just how oppressive the heat of the Australian sun can be. Already the memory of the plane trip fades, and part of me is thinking "oh, it's not so bad" when in reality, it IS that bad, and when I fly back to London I will curse myself for deliberately forgetting.

24 hours without sleep, owing to a very strong coffee at Dubai airport. 24 hours without eating, unless you count smarties. 24 hours of uncomfortable sitting. It's horrible I tell you.

It was worth it though. It's great to be home, back in the bosom of the family so to speak, enjoying sunshine, redskins, balmy evenings. It's nice to have a break from the cold, and to regain feeling in my toes, which I thought had dropped off from the sheer force of cold weeks ago. But no! There they are! Huazzah!

Other than that.... Step up 3 is the worst move I have ever seen, and only the fact that I was on a plane prevented me from switching it off IN DISGUST. Plane food is the worst thing ever, though that's no new news. But maybe it is, given the gusto with which everyone was tucking into it. Have you all forgotten the warnings? Has hunger overridden your sense of taste? Really!

Big congrats to little Bradles too, for graduating uni at long last. His robe made him look like he was in a Quidditch match (well done him), which I think he would have preferred to university.

Speaking of Quidditch..... Google the American Quidditch League. Yes they can! But maybe they shouldn't.

Homecoming

Yes, I'm flying out of the cold and into the summer tomorrow! Can't wait!

ITS GOING TO BE SO SO SUNNY!!!

So, so long London, for now. Don't do anything fun without me......

New tea, new day, same me

Two more sleeps until I leave! Can you tell I'm excited? So ready for a holiday, my head is already completely gone. I can't pay attention at uni, my moot work is terrible, I'm not doing any readings, I'm just chilling and being lazy, and sitting on the edge of my seat in anticipation. Who knew I missed my family this much?

Julian Assange has apparently turned himself in. This is a huge bummer as he was my future husband. I love a rebel. Although, to be honest, if you're going to go to prison anywhere, better Sweden than some CIA hiding spot where you will never be seen again. Apparently the Swedes have five star prisons.

In other news, I'm officially out of underwear. I'm having to do a desperate load of washing, hoping it will dry by tomorrow or else.... I'm going commando. And it's really too cold for that.

But guess what? Two more sleeps and then my mum can do my washing for me! Hurrah!

Grey Monday

No more early mornings, please everyone. I had to get up at 8 AM this morning! Can you believe it! Then I literally just pulled on trousers and ran for the bus because I had to be at uni at 9. And then when I got there I was to tired to contribute anything, so it was absolutely pointless to even be there. For real. Early mornings are the worst. I want a job where I don't have to start until 10. Or live in a country where I am on a different time zone, so I think it's 11 when it's 7 or 8.Hmm, possibilities.

Anyway, good weekend. Worked all day Saturday. Went to someone's house for dinner on Saturday night. Had a church Christmas lunch on Sunday. All kinds of crazy fun (not really. Crazy that is. It doesn't get so crazy at church. But the pork was great). Good weekend :)

Week stretching ahead with so much to do. Flying out on Friday! So excited I am already packed! This is largely because I won't have any other time except for today. My suitcase is so small, I can't believe how little stuff I'm taking. It's not like me at all! I'm using the bag I used for hand luggage when I came here. And half of it's gifts! I am becoming a minimalist.

Told my dad I got another piercing today. The look on his face. It's almost worth getting more for that look of horror. Although maybe I shouldn't. To preserve his life and happiness. Hmm, thoughts.

I want to do something truly London tomorrow because it will be my last chance before I go. Maybe hit the Tate. Don't quite know.

Occupation

The uni is being occupied. By students!!

Now, I know that many of you are reading that thinking, umm, so what? Isn't it always? To be honest, that's what I thought. But this is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT apparently. Students have taken over some of the UCL buildings and are sitting tight and refusing to move, despite the uni trying to get a high court injunction forcing them to leave. The students have been there around the clock for over a week. I personally am impressed. But also a little thrilled to have somewhere warm to eat lunch from now on. They have been protesting in the quad, covering it in chalk drawings, and some of the art students have taken over the Slade buildings. They are saying they won't leave until the uni promises not to raise fees. The uni says it will prosecute the students. Who will win this standoff??

I don't know. But I am currently doing a sit in in my living room and I WILL NOT MOVE until I move the sit in to my bedroom, and then I WILL NOT MOVE until sometime tomorrow. Yawn. (But seriously, total support to them. It's the Right Thing).

In other news, there is a few inches of snow on the ground which is causing some drama with the slipping and sliding and the freezing-ness. But I'm dealing. Got my dissertation title approved! Then had a three and a half hour moot meeting. Tres tres tired. Tres.

Tomorrow? Work. In a week? Australia! Sunshine! Yay!

Don't eat the yellow snow

Yes it's snowing! I'm very excited, to the point where I ran outside in my pyjamas this morning, bare foot, and nearly froze to death, while my flatmate yelled out "Kathryn! What are you doing??" She had a good point. It's cold.

But I am excited in the way that only someone who hasn't grown up with snow is. I don't see the disruption, the ice, the endless difficulties presented by the slush on the roads: I only see the light white flake falling from the sky onto my nose. And to me, it's magical.

The freezing cold is less exciting.

Less than two weeks until I go home! Can't wait to see everyone and eat Australian food and have a time out from snow inducing weather. It's thrilling. Unfortunately, my weekend was not very exciting so there's nothing to share there. My friend Judith came over for a movie night and then I spent Sunday at church. Non-stop I know! Still, it's too cold to leave the flat really. So I'm hibernating. Like a blonde bear. Bring supplies please!!!!!

The Word Is

That its going to snow this weekend. it's definitely cold enough. it's absolutely freezing and I think that I have caught pnuemonia or something equally horrible from sitting outside on Wednesday (damn police). I am writing this to put off having to go to uni becauseI have a moot meeting which I don't feel like going to because our coach is going to tell us how we are useless and how my work isn't as good as Sam's. And all I can think is "Sam is halfway through his arguments and has written 16 pages. I have completed my arguments and they are 14. Page limit is 12.5 5 points off per page over. Who is going to be losing the points here?" Which is annoying, and it's too cold so I'm not in the mood to be my usual sunshiney self.

In other news, my boss is saying he won't give anyone time off for Christmas. So I have to go and argue with him, and if he won't budge... quit. Fingers crossed for me everyone, I don't want to spend the new year job hunting!

No ifs, no buts, no education.... wait a second, let us out!

Yes, its true, I went to the student protests yesterday. Let me say that this is because I think the issue is serious: people have a right to have access to higher education, without being priced out of the running. So at 12, I went down to the UCL quad, listened to a speech, and then prepared to march. But.... they weren't marching. They were staging a sit in. Deciding immediately that this was LAME, I left, had a coffee and jumped on the bus home. While on the bus, the driver makes an announcement, saying that the roads aroundWestminster are closed, so you have to take the tube if you are travelling that way. Closed? Hmm, I thought. Sounds delicious. I promptly got off and jumped onto the tube to Westminster.

I got off, immediately noticed a police presence in the station, then walked upstairs. It was a little eerie next to Westminster Abbey, because they'd shut off all the traffic. There were a heap of confused tourists milling around, dozens of police, and over on a street leading up to Parliament Square, loads bangs, small explosions, and a wall of irritated looking police. I walked over to check it out. There were about thirty people standing there, looking over the wall of police to the protest. The police had set up a row of officers, then some vans, then another row, creating a kind of dead space in between. So I stood there for a while, occasionally chanting with the rest of them (I do love a good chant).

"No ifs, no buts, no education cuts!"
"Nick Clegg shame on you, shame on you for turning blue." And the like. A school girl had gotten a hold of a broken megaphone and was yelling this out to us, waving her signs. The best of which were:

"I cant afford a sign, how am I supposed to pay for university?" Written on an A4 piece of file paper.
"Dumbledore would not put up with this sh*t".
"Dobby did not die for this".
"FML".

The police told us that there were blocks on either end of the road, so no one could get in or out. How interesting, we thought. I started chatting to the lady next to me, who did her Masters in Law at the same place I am, when we noticed people walking through the blockade on the other side of the road. Oh, we thought, they must be turning everyone back the other way from parliament square. Well, lets go. We can march on to Trfalger Square and then head home. It's about three at this point.

So we walk into the cordoned off area. The police are pushing everyone back trying to reclaim their graffittied police van (which someone later told me was probably left there, in the middle of the protest, in the hopes it would get vandalised, so they could show everyone how violent we are). We walked through to the other side, only to be told that no, no one is getting out there. So we walk back where we came from, only to be told that no, no one's getting out there. What? we ask. Surely this is a violation of our civil liberties. Shrug, goes the constable.

The next three hours were vey very cold. It was getting later and darker, no one had eaten for hours, boys were peeing on the side of the road, girls were lying down crying, people started lighting fires to escape the cold, it was insane. And the police weren't budging. At about five they bought in port-a-loos and started shuffling people through. One girl told me that this was like the G20 protests, and they kept them there all night. But I was supposed to start work at 5! I told the police man. Shrug goes the constable.

At about six, I was standing at the front of the mosh, facing the police with my new friend, who was arguing in a very lawyerly fashion about how they need to let us leave. She gave him a business card, and said "you can track me down if you need to". Shrug goes the constable. But hen, by some miracle, he gets a nod from someone else, and says to the two of us "ok, off you go". Se we ran for freedom, out into parliament square, breathing in the fresh, fire free air. And then I went straight to work. I heard later they didn't let everyone go until midnight, because they were releasing people only in twos and threes and only every ten or fifteen minutes. And there were thousands of us.

Then I went to work, having had no food all day and being slightly freezing and traumatised, and being very tired. It was a great shift, of course.

The worst thing was when I got home, and the media had written it up as being a violent protest, contained by the police. Which is ridiculous. Towards the end all we were chanting was "LET US OUT". And sure there were people sitting on bus stops and climbing walls, but so what? As one girl said, "Its like a festival. But shit."

Lazy Saturday

It's a lazy Saturday, and to be honest I could not be happier. I have about a thousand things I should be doing, but I am sitting on the sofa watching a Michael Buble music video, drinking hot chocolate, thinking study? That can wait until Monday! Can't believe the new Harry Potter movie has been out for 24 hours and I have not yet seen it. This is the only thing that is marring an otherwise cheerful morning.

Was working in Ludgate Hill last night, which is near St Paul's cathedral for those of you not in the know, and had a very weird conversation with some of my customers. One of them was trying to convince me to go to dinner with him, and I was saying "no thanks" because let's be honest, most of them have wives and girl friends at home. Then his friend turns to me and says, "I'm not as subtle as my friend. I'm just going to wait outside til you finish your shift and then attack and rape you." It was weird. I had to laugh though. Just the way he said it. And he was not a very intimidating looking guy. Though I did tell them that if they didn't act sensibly, I would get Nick, the enormous guy who was working behind the bar, to beat them up. That scared them!

I walked back from St Paul's to home, which took me about 50 minutes, and it was so cold it took my breath away. It's a nice walk though, peaceful and beautiful, past the Tate Modern and the Globe theatre. I love the idea of walking this route which people have been walking along for hundreds of years, doing the same thing as me (well, on the South Bank, its more likely the were prostitutes or drunks, but you know what I mean).

I'm going to be home 3 weeks from today. Cant believe it! Can't wait.

Photos

I'm a genius. And I just figured out how to upload photos!! Yay! So I will upload a few for the fans..... who have requested them....
Have gone back and attached them to relevant posts. As many as I can be bothered. But here is a picture of a squirrel. The one who jumped on my leg back in August. Everyone say AWWWWWWWWWWW.

Pimpin'

I feel like I should pimp my blog. For realsies. I have no pictures, no art, no nothing. Should I make this more entertaining for you readers? All two of you? Maybe.

Was at work last night, and I had a booking of people from Deutsche Bank. Now, I like bankers as much as anyone (so, not at all) but they are good tippers. So of course I was planning on being on my BEST behaviour. But my boss, Adam, thought I needed some extra tips. My boss gave me such good advice, I thought I'd share it with you all. Here is how our conversation went:

A: "Kathryn, you have booking tonight."
Me: "Great."
A: "They are very important people. You treat them well. Don't screw this up."
Me: "Adam, its not my first day. She'll be right."
A: "Yeah it better be. Cos if you screw this up, I loose my job. And you die."
Me: "Adam, is that a death threat?"
A: "No no, a bit. Just be friendly."
Me: "I'm always friendly!"
A: "No, I mean, be friendly, but not too friendly. Keep your dignity."
Me: "Adam, what are you trying to say here?"
A: "Be friendly. If you screw this up, then you'll never see Australia again.
Me: "What???"
A: "Yeah. You never see Australia again. Maybe I show you on a map, but you never see the country in life again. NOt your family, not your friends, not the kangaroos. Nothing. You get me?"
By this point, I'm laughing too hard to reply.

The booking went fine though. They gave me an 80 pound tip, and some half bottles of wine which my friend and I drank at the end of work. Awesome!

Spent today studying. I'm getting that pale, drawn look that people get when they spend too much time in the library. It might be better than my pale, drawn look that I get when I have last minute exam worries, but I'm not sure yet. I'm sick on sitting in a room full of silent people, all trying to out do each other with how smart they look. I'm not cut out for this I tell you!

My postman

Today I met the postman. I was walking back from the Big Tesco on the Old Kent Road, carrying four boxes of wine gums for my mum (they had buy one get one free, so I thought I would stock up for my trip home) when I came around the corner and there, putting the letters in the slot, was my postman. I aid hello, he smiled and asked me if I was from number 4 (because he had a parcel for them), I said no, and then walked in, back to my life.

The whole thing made me think. I mean, for one thing, I'm not even sure if this is my usual postman. Do they change routes at all? Is it always the same guy? But the real question is this- at Christmas time, should I give him some chocolate/fruit mince pies/a card/a tip? I remember people used to do things like this in the olden days (like, the 80's or whatever) but do we still do them? Should I wait for him sometime in December (as he always comes at the same time) and give him a gift? Is it weird, or just nice? Thoughts anyone?

Oh and mum- I will probably eat the wine gums before I get home. Sorry :)

Late night pizza express

Nothing new to report I'm afraid. I missed the Harry Potter premier because I had to work! Ripped! And I was at New Oxford Street, so just a stone's throw away from Leicster Square! Life is so unfair sometimes.

Work, uni tedium.
Nothing new.
Sorry, I started writing a haiku there, but then remembered that I can't remember how many beats go into eat haiku line. OH WELL.

Worked in Chiswell St yesterday, where the men are ugly and the women are bitches. Had to fight with my boss to get my tips from last week because they never put them in the box or wrote them in the notepad. And I was like, excuse me. But I got 20 pounds in tips. And I want it. Luckily they wrote it in the accounting book, so I got my money. But seriously, who didn't but them in the lock box? Come on people. Then went and met up with a friend after work, found out they cancelled my shift for tomorrow and then had late night dinner at Pizza Express which was great fun. My life is so awesome...... But today I got to sleep in until 11, so things are already starting to look up. New series of the Misfits is on now too :) love love love.

And that's it. That's all there is. Having a girls movie night tonight. So that should be good.

3 months ago

So I was just perusing my blog (as I like to do when I'm procrastinating) and I was reading some of my entries from August. I found one that I wrote on the 7th of August (almost exactly three months ago) where I was talking about how I wished it was three months down the line, when I was going to uni and working and had friends. And it was weird to realise that it was now three months down the line, and I am working and going to uni and I have friends. And it's a bit strange to remember that, because it really doesn't seem that long ago. I mean, three months is a quarter of a year, and I've been working for two and a half months and going to uni for six weeks, but it all still feels recent. Part of me still feels like I just waved my parents off at the airport. But it's coming up to five months since I left, and I'm sitting here, considering if I've gotten all the things I wanted to from leaving, and if I've changed at all. Here's what I think:

1) I'm most definitely more confident than I was. I'm not afraid to do things on my own.
2) I work harder at uni than I did before. And I worry about uni more than I did before.
3) I worry about other things a bit less than I did before. Except getting a post-uni job. That still gives me ulcers.
4) I think I've lost a few kilos. Yay.

Other than that, I don't think I've changed very much at all. I haven't transformed into a fabulous, glamorous person. I don't hang out with people who are in Tatler. I don't go to Kensington Roof Gardens and chill with Prince Harry. I'm pretty much still me. I don't think that life here is better than in Perth, just different.

Hmm. Enough introspection. Harry Potter premier today!!!!!! Think I should skip work, dress up and go down to the red carpet to see the stars. Ahh, dream come true!! Haha. Well, that's all for now. Happy birthday to my big sister Corrie. Hope Warren spoiled you :)

Guy Fawkes and the increasing cold

So, I haven't blogged for a while. Sorry to my fanssss. I know your out there.... Haha. Not much to report. I'll try and go in chronological order....

Halloween was a bigger deal here than I expected. I was working that night, and agreed to meet up with a friend after work for a quick bite and a catch up. So she comes in, and it's been pretty quiet, so we decide to walk up the road to Shoreditch, none the wiser. We get to our fave dim sum spot, walk in and.... yes. It was full of freaks dressed up. Crazy, crazy costumes, fake blood and spiderwebs everywhere, a line a mile long for drinks.... Quickly realising dim sum was not happening for us this evening, we wandered on up the street only to realise this was not an isolated event. There were freaks dressed up everywhere! Including one guy who look like half a shark. He had a grey piece of rubber wrapped around his upper torso, and had cut a hole out for his face and drawn blood and teeth onto the whole so it looked like a mouth. He could move his arms, cos they were pinned down by the rubber. I told him he looked like a mermaid in reverse, and he told me the good news was that the right half was all man. Great. It was at this point that I decided to take a taxi home instead of waiting for a bus.

I have survived my first Guy Fawkes night, which was cool. They were letting off fire crackers up and down my street which really interfered with my nap I must say. Also saw a building on fire and the fire men rushing in to save the day, which made me loudly declare "SEE! THAT'S WHY THEY ARE ILLEGAL IN MY TOWN!" So there. Perth 1, London 238. Well done Perth :) I'm afraid I didn't participate in any revelry though, because I went to a friend's place and watched the Disney CLASSIC beauty and the beast.

The clocks have also gone back since we spoke last. This is kind of terrible because now it gets dark between 4 and 5 instead of between 5 and 6. Oh sure, they say it means and extra hour of sun in the morning, but as someone who sleeps in until 9 every morning, this is no consolation. It's also getting colder... and colder... and colder....

On Saturday night, hit up the Prohibition party, which is a 1920's themed party here in London. Was very cool, complete with a menu pasted into a book (to avoid suspicion), drinks served in tea cups (so no one would know they were alcoholic), gambling, and actors dressed up as policemen trying to break up the party. All great fun. Only one problem towards the end of the night, when I was dancing with a guy who spun me a little too enthusiastically, causing me to slam into another girl, causing both of us to tumble to the ground, ripping my dress. My partner, seeing the trouble, quickly left. Chivalry is dead! Luckily, someone came to my rescue so I didn't suffer the shame of sitting a dance out.Then, my friend Judith's conquest treated us to McDonalds. Nothing beats the taste of a cheese burger at 3:30 in the morning. I then made best friends with a stoned South African and a scary emo chick on the bus. (No really. I'm not being sarcastic. They were lovely).

In other news..... I am coming home for Christmas! Cheer! Yes, I have changed my flight and am coming back to the sunny shores of Perth on the 11 of December. Leaving again pn the 26th. Can't wait! Was meant to be coming back in April, but I have something on then, so I changed my flights to take advantage of sunshine and my mum's home made fruit mince pies. Yeah!! So coffees all round I should think. Ooh, and I want to go to Muffin Break for a Mars Bar slice.... Delish!

Other than that, I'm afraid it's just been uni and work. More uni than work lately, but that's ok. Have to do two covers this week, so I am not impressed :( Hate doing covers because you never know anyone there, or where everything is, and you look really incompetent when really you just need to get your bearings. Hopefully it'll be fine though. And then I have the great fun of hanging out with a moot group on Friday..... Another two hours of public international law. I'm telling you, I didn't study this much even when I was studying public international law. It's not right!!

Well..... see you all in one month form today!!!

Rat-a-tat-tat goes the washing machine

In the background, and it raises the question that I have been asking myself ALL week. How do I have so much washing?? This is the third load I've done all week, and it's only Wednesday. Where are all these clothes coming from? Maybe I should do washing on a more regular basis.....

Anyway, it's early (not even nine yet!) and cold and quite dark all things considered. Winter is definitely settling in. It's odd though, because I've never experienced a real autumn before and it's quite pleasant, walking around with leaves scattered literally everywhere. And you always see people sweeping them up, but it never seems to help.

Had a meeting for my moot yesterday, and it basically turned into this one guy lecturing the rest of us, even though one fo the other guys already had the answers. And I'm thinking, could you not have put these notes online and saved me a trip to uni on my day off? So I amy hate this guy. Although I will, of course, be copying his answers in exams.

Have to go to work tonight. I CANT BE BOTHERED. All I want to do is sleeeeeeep. It;s probably my fault for staying up and watching sex and the city on fiver last night. But come on. Who wouldn't have done that? Better go. I got up this early to do osme study. Shudder.

So, I am meant to be studying

But I'm writing on my blog instead. That's how much I care friends. THIS much.

I have finally gone to the doctor about my infected mouth, and I now have anti-biotics!! So I should be fighting fit in a week or so. Just in time to spend my entire weekend working. Huzzah!

Funny thing happened to me at work on Friday- I was SEXUALLY HARASSED. One of my customers comes up to me to apologise for his friend knocking into me, causing me to drop two pints of beer. How nice, I thought. So he apologises and then asks if he can kiss me. How polite, I think. But not thanks. He argues the point for a while, but, accepting my decision, moves the conversation onto other subjects. The weather, my job, etc. I am mid0sentence when he grabs my by the shoulders and swoops in to kiss me. Luckily I have very quick reflexes (and he was drunk and bit slow) so I managed to dodge his gaping mouth before I ran away screaming. I am scarred for life!!

Another interesting thing that happened to me on Saturday was passing a REAL LIVE GENUINE PICKET. That's right! The fire station up the road from me (yes, I feel very safe with them around, but they never wash the fire trucks topless which really sucks) where having a protest against government cuts. Which was basically just them standing around in uniform holding signs while drivers honked their horns at them. I nodded, displaying, I hope, solidarity.

Anyway, I better get back to study. Actually I might have lunch instead. Yay!!

The Blitz Party

So last night I went to this very, very cool party called the Blitz Party. It's got a 1940's theme, like WWII, and as you all know I'll take any excuse to dress up and dance like an idiot. Lots of fun :) one guy was dressed up like a school boy with a tag around his neck, and there were a great deal of service men wandering the air raid shelter, much to my delight.... i was unsuccessful in steal a hat though. Sadly.

Best thing someone said to me all night: (on the way home, all my make up has come off revealing my admittedly disgusting infected lips): "Ahhhhhh! You look like the Joker from Batman!!!" I told this guy, who was a total random, to take a hike, to which he said "Hmm. You want to come home with me?" How could I resist such an offer? It was a real feat, but somehow I turned him down. To which he said: "Do you want to buy some pills or coke?" WOW. I had met a real winner. The weddings in June guys.

We also went to a fifties bar after the party (definite theme to the night) with some people we met at the party, because one of them was a guy who had caught my friends eye, so to speak. It was good actually, because they played all music from the fifties, and this guy invited me to dance, and spent a song spinning me around and dipping me. That doesn't happen every day. I also finally achieved my dream of snapping someone's suspenders. Fab! So a night of dreams coming true really. Snapping suspenders. Going to an air raid shelter. Meeting the man of my dreams. How can next weekend compare? We shall see.

Brrrrrr.

Best thing I have overheard lately: (walking along Oxford St)
"Yeah, but you know the guys who grows the weed?"
"The really posh guys?"
"Yeah, yeah, them. Well, you know the one who got shot in the foot?"
At this point I was swept away by the crowd, without ever finding out what else happened to the posh guy who got shot in the foot.

Anyway! Long time no hear! Part of me feels like I just wrote recently, but it has been a while. Time is rushing by. October is nearly done, and I can't believe it! So, news:
1) I got new boots. Boot Quest is over. Big thanks to all participants.
2) I am doing a moot (Telders). A Moot is like a mock trial/debate thing. I had to try out and everything which was scary because I had five people firing questions at me to see how I handled pressure. It's nice to know that I handle pressure quite well, although it was 10 degrees in there and I was sweating bullets, so not that well. But I'm in, so everyone should come and watch and bring foam fingers and placards.
3) I still have cold sores, going on four weeks now, so any remedies are welcome (I've had the best success with toothpaste thus far).

And that's all I can think of so far. I've been studying alot lately, for this moot and for uni. I haven't missed a single class yet, and I think I have spent more time in the library studying in three weeks than I did in a year at Murdoch. Crazy.

Better go though.... have to catch a bus. Big congrats to Capital D for getting engaged.... and not telling me. Well, as revenge I have told EVERYONE!! (Or at least the five people who read my blog).

Pick up lines or the Desperation of men

Here's a simple fact: when you work in a bar, despite the fact that you have mad hair and your make up is sweated off and you are wearing a hideous apron, you will get alot of guys cracking onto you. There's a lot of reasons for this: Beer goggles, the fact that as a waitress you are meant to be polite to them, or maybe it's just some primal instinct making them think: 1) I am drunk, 2) I am glad to be drunk, 3) the Bringer of Alcohol (ie that blond girl) has contributed to me being drunk, 4) therefore the Bringer of Alcohol is the Woman for Me. Or maybe it's just that they're drunk and will say anything. Anyway, as such, I have accumulated some fairly hilarious pick up lines, which I now share with you, all of which are open for you to use later on, on your very own waitress ("the Bringer of Alcohol"). Please note: None of these are made up. All of these have been tried, with varying degrees of success on me, sometimes by guys who I am not serving.

1) "Your glasses are very pretty."
2) "Agree or disagree: Chocolate Hob Nobs are the best biscuits ever."
3) "My friend here, he's a drug dealer form Brooklyn. He's really cool."
4) "I'm into mixed martial arts. I'm not actually. But I have a huge calculator, which works out tax for me."
5) "You're really sexy. I'm going to watch you work for a while."
6) "So when are we going out for lunch? I'm really nice. No, I am. You won't meet a better guy than me."
7) "So did they train you to get rid of dirty old men?" (Friend) "If they did, you'll need to start using that training now."

And the best for last:
8) "So you're from Australia? How are things Down Under?" Greeted with uproarous laughter.

Anyway, all good ones. None of which worked. I mean, I have standards. There are a load of others which are all fairly standard, but these were the stand outs.

Good night and good luck my friends.

A fat lip, but it's really my pride that's hurting

Well, it's Monday now, which means the weekend is over, which means that my weekend truly begins. I feel like I do so much over the weekend that by the time Monday rolls around I need a few days to chill and do nothing. Luckily, I'm not working today or tomorrow and I don't have any classes. So all I have to do is chill out and do my readings (shudder). But hey, I can sleep in.

Anyway, my weekend was pretty crazy. On Friday, I didn't finish work until 1 am, and then, since i had missed ht last bus anyway, my friend Judith and I decided to hang out for a while. So we start walking down the street, in the general direction of the bus, and we meet these good looking guys who start chatting to us (the upside of having a friend like Judith, who is amazing looking. The down side of course is that these good looking guys are never talking to me). Anyway, I was distracted by one of them, who was talking to me, and walked straight head on into a pole. Bruising my lip, seriously injuring my pride, and earning me the nick name, for the rest of the night, of LP (Lamp post). Awesome.

Anyway, I got home safe and sound, recovered just barely from the humiliation. Slept for a few hours, then hit the library on a Saturday, like a nerd, before getting together with some of my peeps for a quiet drink on Saturday night. It really was a quiet drink because my friend Nikki didn't have ID, so we wound up on someone's roof terrace eating gummi bears, before i headed off after an hour. Fun, fun, fun.

So now its the week again, and I'm still feeling ill, but I have finally signed up for the doctor, so if I wanted to, I could do something about it. Huzzah!

That's all for now. Send me some emails guys.

Forever

I know, it's been forever since I wrote on this. I'm sorry. I'm lazy. But I'm here now! Forgive me!

Anyway, heaps has been happening. I've been working alot, as per usual, not shopping enough which is making me very sad (although I did get a great jacket from H&M the other day....) and yesterday I started uni! Yay!

I'm loving uni, I must say. I'm a total nerd I know, but I love sitting there and listening to lecturers talking about whether or not morality is absolute, the evolution of childrens rights (did you know that children weren't protected from harm by legislation until 66 years after the RSPCA was formed? Interesting) and getting back into uni in general. I even got my student card, with a very bad photo, and you need to swipe it to get into buildings and the library, which is terribly futuristic. And John Finnis is coming here is March to speak! Which is exciting! Because I love him. And when I meet him I'm going to get him to sign a copy of his book :)

Other than that work is going quite well. I don't hate my job too badly. Just a little. Most of the time. But there you go.

There's heaps more I should be writing hear. But I just can't think of it.

I'll try and write again soon. Sorry my darlings :)

Freezing, freezing, freezing

It's so cold here. I hate to tell you that. But this is way too cold. It's like Australian winter here. But it's only September!! I can't handle it my friends.

Anyway, complaints aside all is well on this side of the pond so to speak. I am still gainfully employed, though who knows for how much longer, and work is going well. I stayed at my friend Judith's on Friday night, which was lovely, and made me appreciate my place so much more as her's is tiny and horrible. London apartments are generally speaking quite terrible. Then I went to work on Saturday and scored some free stuff. It seemed like a good idea, as the bus stop is just across the street, so carrying home two boxes of plates and glasses seemed fine. But that was before I realised that the bus stops on Bishopsgate weren't running, so I had to walk about a kilometre to Aldgate to get a bus. Not fun, let me tell you. But I still scored free stuff. Silver lining.

Other than that, fairly uneventful weekend. Did nothing on Saturday night as I was feeling a little ill. Then Sunday just church and lunch with a friend. I know! My life is so cool and non-stop! Hahaha. Starting uni soon. That should be cool and non-stop right? Right??

Sickly

Yes faithful readers, I have a cold and it sucks. Well, it mostly sucks. I am a little glad because I called in sick to work today and it is raining. So at least I'm not sitting at home sick while the sun is shining. Thats a silver lining.

Anyway, what's been new in my life? Not too much. Working, which has been stressful, because my manager keep firing people, most of them my friends. Nikki and Debs got told they were being moved to a different bar, and when they got there, all ready to work, they found out it was an interview and they had been effectively fired. Then Clarence got fired, and Simona and Kelly. So I am very stressed trying not to make a single mistake in case I get fired too. Which is why I kept working even though I was sick and I am now subsequently even more sick. So my system did not work.

Other than that not much else has been going on. Work is still dramatic. People are hooking up then hooking up with other people and then the people they hooked up with first find out, get annoyed and then hook up with someone else as revenge. It's getting very hard to keep up. The other problem is that we have a communal staff/change room. So sometimes you are sitting there, reading and eating a banana and someone will take off their shirt. Or you walk in to check your phone, and there is a naked man standing there. It's getting scary.

Anyway, I better go because I have to go to uni and enroll. Awesome fun..... See you all later :)

Friday night's all right for fighting

Last night, I was witness to my first ever fight. It was pretty exciting for me, I must say. I was just chilling on the street with some work people, when these two guys started punching each other up. One guy got knocked into Gigi, who knocked into me, so my boss stood in front of us while the bouncers sorted it out. It was thrilling!!

The fight kind of set the scene for the whole night, I must say. It was very dramatic. I was working 12 til close, which is hellish to begin with, but then we were super busy. Then two of my really good friends got told they are being moved to a different bar, because they didn't fit in with the clientele of ours, which was really sad and I will miss them. Then I was critisized by one of the managers for having too much fun chatting to customers. I don't know if she was saying I wasn't working hard enough or if she was insinuating I was a slut. EIther way, unkind. Then everyone finished work at 10, except me, and they all sat around the bar drinking and throwing things at me while I worked behind the bar. Then this guy tried to buy me a drink, while I was standing next to the manager who was annoyed I was having too much fun. So now she thinks I'm trying to get drinks off people. Great. After work, we all stayed and chilled for a while because one of the managers was leaving, which is when I witnessed the very cool fight.

So all in all, a very eventful night.

One of my friends came and stayed over at my place, which was nice, and she just left, so I am chilling alone. The last week has been pretty tiring, so I am enjoying some sofa time. In answer to some questions about the blog people have been emailing me about: The name of the bar I'm working for is All Bar One. It's on Liverpool St. Hmm. There were other questions to answer, but I can't remember what they were. Re-email me please.

Good night and good luck everyone :)

These are the days of our lives

Work is turning into a bit of a soap opera. Honestly. Every day when I walk into work I feel like I'm walking onto the set of a soap opera. Who isn't talking? Who had a drama with a customer? Who's in love with whom? Who has that really, really cute guy sitting in their section? Ok the last one was me asking, but still. Nonetheless, it's still quite fun. I find I don't mind hard physical labour (no double entendre please) and I don't mind chatting with people. Who knew that I was friendly? Certainly not me.

The other day I was at work and one of the customers (who wasn't even mine) stopped me to tell me that I had amazingly straight teeth. "Your parents must have put alot of money into those!" He exclaimed. "Did you have braces?" I politely explained that no, I never had braces, but the whole time I was thinking "Is this a really, really, really bad line? Or are you honestly interested in possible orthodontic work being carried out in the southern hemisphere?" I have resolved to avoid being friendly to people who aren't my customers because they aren't paying me. Although even when I am friendly to my customers, they don't always tip me. I mean, really, do you think I'm being nice to you because I like you?? No!! I want your money! Come on! Just because you hear an Australian accent does not, I repeat, DOES NOT mean you can take on Australia's tipping habits. We have a higher minimum wage in my country, for goodness sakes!

Speaking of the minimum wage..... I plan on picketing parliament for a rise in the minimum wage level. Because it's truly appalling. This weekend? Parliament Square? Meet me by Democracy Village, or the Dispossessed, or whatever they're calling themselves this week. Bring placards!!

Day off!!

Well everyone, it has been a while. And that worries me, because I do want to keep this as a record for me as well as an entertaining read for you guys at work. I don't think I've put anything of value in this blog for a few days. Possibly many.

Well, work, as has been mentioned, has been crazy and insane. We opened this week, which was kind of cool. The opening party was crazy and busy. My customers kept sneaking me drinks to get me through the night, and one of them fixed my hair for me, which was a little odd I must say. Then my friend Nikki got into a fight with one of the people, culminating in her telling the woman to "meet her outside" and the woman throwing a glass at the wall and running out the front door. Nikki cut her hand on the glass and got very drunk. Then I told my future manager that he looked like the kid from Stuart Little. This was before realising he was my future manager. Oops.

Before that we had the dry runs, which is where people come in and get a free meal while we get to practice. And that was hell on earth. 400 people all at once, rushing through demanding food. Terrible! I barely survived. Twelve hour shifts, no breaks, on your feet running up and down stairs all the time..... nightmare. None of my customers were getting their food, and the people behind the bar were morons.... seriously, how hard is it to pull a pint? (It's not hard- I wound up doing all my own).

Now that we are open, I am hoping things will calm down a bit and go back to normal. Friday was ok. I got loads of tips :) I nearly doubled my pay with tips. Lovely.

I had Saturday off and then slept for most of it. Sunday I had to work which was dead, dead, dead, but I did make it to church in the evening so I was happy. And I think that's everything that happened.

Oh, one more thing. I got my ear pierced :) Awesome. Went and got it done with Rachel and Janet when they were here. But mum and dad have only just found out, so it's now safe to tell the world. So yes. I am now one of the unwashed, pierced miscreants of London. Except that I am washed. And I'm not really a miscreant. But you know what I mean!

Laters......

Bah

62 hours i have worked in the last six days. 62. Hours. Bah. My feet hurt, and I'm so tired I can barely see straight. But guess what? I have tomorrow off! Very exciting. Work is going well. I like the people I work with (mostly) and guess what? I am getting tips! Love this country. Woo. I have many funny stories to write down. But they must wait until tomorrow.

Bbbbbyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeee.

The Last of the Mohicans

is currently on TV. Can someone tell me how it ends please? And how it starts? So I can go to bed.

I am feeling quite sick as I have eaten most of a packet of sour straps and am thinking about finishing it. I am also tired. This working lark is too much I tell you. We open for dry runs tomorrow and i am too tired to be worried. It will only get worse too, as I am working 11:30 to close tomorrow and Wednesday. We close about 11. Then we have to clean. Bah.

Weird thing someone said today: (in reference to a comment about the beer the pope drinks): "Which pope?" Christopher Pope of course. He lives up the road. Awesome.

I also now know how to pull a pint. Get excited :)

That's all my tired brain has for me. See you later.

Bring it On: All Or Nothing. Though really there is a whole range of partial options lying between "all" and "nothing"

Hello all of you out there in the blogosphere. It's Saturday morning, my day off (woo) and I am sitting at home, having slept all morning, watching the wind dry my sheets (its doing a crap job) and pondering the mysteries of life. I have a little to report, mostly weird things that have happened to me lately.

Work is going well, I now have a crew, which is fabulous, and I'm very tired because I've been working hard (don't laugh) and didn't finish work until 11 last night because I valiantly stayed to help with the beer delivery, with my crew (which meant sitting around drinking beer and eating pizza and then letting the beer delivery guys in to unload the truck and getting paid). I have to go into work tomorrow even though it's Sunday which sucks BIG time. But at least I shall be paid. Ahh, money. How I dream of it.

Anyway, one really weird thing did happen to me the other day, right after I wrote my last blog entry. I went for a walk as it was a pleasant evening, and there were these 9 year old kids on the path. Ahh, thought I, the younger generation getting some fresh air and oxygen. And I felt quite benevolent towards them as I was having a nice evening. Until, that is, one of the little bastards (its in the Bible, it's ok to say) FLASHED me and the rest of them started yelling out sexually explicit comments to me (one of them offered me a sexual service which made me blush). I walked on much faster, feeling very annoyed. I mean, seriously, when I was there age I was still playing with barbies (I miss Barbie).

Then, on my way BACK form my walk (I went to the park and then came back) which group of miscreants should I stumble upon? You guessed right. They repeated their offers (by now I wanted to scream out "I'm not a pervert!! Get away from me!!") but I studiously ignored them, which got me this response from one of them:

"Look at her. She loves it."

All I could conclude is that these boys will end up as rapists. Seriously, someone needs to teach them that when someone pretends you don't exist, she doesn't love it. For real.

Anyway, I was pretty funny. Slightly scarring, but pretty funny. Not much else has been going on (work, eat, sleep, check out cute guys on the street, the usual). So I'm sorry if my blog is becoming boring for you all. Hopefully the next week at work will be exciting.

Until then, love Me.

Employment

Employment. Crazy stuff. I have now been employed for three (count it, three) full days, and I tell you, it's tough. The good news is, I like the people I work with (mostly). The bad news is, I think I was born for unemployment. Getting up, getting dressed, catching the bus, it may all be too much. But then you arrive and you are expected to (gasp!) complete tasks. Within a set time. Excuse me? What?

Anyway. Just training at the moment. Having a very good time, wine tasting, cocktail tasting, food tasting, it's definitely been some of the best training I've done. Have even made some friends, which is all good news. I don't have any funny stories though, which is disappointing, because I feel like this is what you guys are tuning in for. But I have nothing. I have found the best cocktail bay in Soho though. I'm writing it here so that you can all go there when you are in London. It's called the Academy or LAB. GO THERE. It's great and there's a very good looking bar man.

Hmm, not too much else I'm afraid. But enough about me. What's new with you? Really? No! He didn't! Glad we got to catch up like this!

Talk later..... Love Kat

Why's it called a bank holiday?

So, today is a Bank Holiday which is great and all that, but why is it called a bank holiday is everyone's off (except retail staff, suckers). And what's it for? At least in Aus we tell you why there's a day off: Anzac Day, Labour Day etc. But whatever its a day off. Woot!

So, nice quiet weekend. Jo was away so I was flying solo, but I went to lunch with some friends on Saturday, at a Cafe Rouge in Greenwich. I was mainly excited about being at zero degrees (on the globe, not the temp, as that's not exciting at all) because the world started and finished around me. Hmm. I definitely recommend the desserts at Cafe Rouge, although the food wasn't great- I mean, it tasted fine but I felt hat for the price I could have gotten something nicer elsewhere. Then Sunday, church, lunch with church people, learned how to do a Rubix cube, promptly forgot how to do a Rubix cube, church. So a nice weekend.

Big news of course is that (for those of you who are following my blog and paying attention) I am starting my new job tomorrow! Ahh, scary and nervous and worried and every other thing. What should I wear? Will the others like me? I am hoping it will go fine though.... I really want this job to be great! But I will update you when I have more to say on it than just nervous babbling....

Until then! Laters, Kat (yeah, I'm such a chav).

So, updates

Hello fans, and future me reading over this,

Well! I have been a little lax over the last few days (sorry) so i will provide a quick update for you all.... As you know my friends from Australia were visiting, Rachel and Janet, which was great. We went and saw all the sights, like Tower Bridge, London Bridge, Big Ben, Houses of Parliament, Trafalgar Square, Buckingham Palace, Hyde park, Camden, my house, Oxford St, Portobello Road.... it was great, even if it did rain a bit. Here are the highlights, in no particular order:

1) On the first night they were here, we went to a pub up the road from my house and went in the pub quiz and came DEAD LAST. In fairness the questions were all English related and really hard! We called ourselves Team Wombat, and when announcing that we were loses, the quiz master called us the "fit Aussies". We may not know what a claret is, but we are fit :)

2) We went to Hyde Park and were lying in the reluctant sunshine reading magazines when a squirrel came over and climbed onto my leg. It was so cute! Although I must confess all I could think was "rabies!!!"

3) Rachel doing a Mary Poppins every time we got onto an escalator, and putting her arms out in front of her as we moved up.

4) When we were at Buckingham Palace, and were befriended by some Roman guys who made us take a picture with them (and some other randoms they called into shot) before asking if they could come back to Australia with us because one of them was in love with a girl from Sydney who he met two days earlier and now can't locate. (So many things I wanted to say. So. Many.)

5) This little cafe in Camden near the loch which sold homemade tea blends and scones and had all mismatched falling apart furniture. So Camden.

6) Buying Mars Planets because they kept advertising them during Friends. You win this round, advertising industry.

7) The Hummingbird Bakery on Portobello Road.... mmmm.... I recommend the whoopie cakes or the red velvet cupcakes.

That is all I can think of so far. So an excellent few days all up :) They left today, so I am a little sad. Who will I watch Friends with now? Who indeed.

Until next time fans!! Love Kat

Rice success

I just cooked rice. All by myself. And it was great!!

Anyway, this will have to be short.... Janet and Rachel are visiting from Aus which is nice, we did a heap of touristy stuff today. Fun fun fun. I am sleeping on the couch which is lovely. Suprisingly comfy.

Anyway, will write more later.... because I am watching a movie....

Love Kathryn

Sunday night, and there's a weather warning

"It is still autumn, though you'd be forgiven for thinking October had jumped the line" says the weatherman on the TV, because there are heavy rains and a weather warning out for tonight. It's going to be cold tonight and tomorrow. Fab. Anyway I am chilling and watching TV, duh, checking out facebook, and for the first time ever, I am putting a ban on discussing politics.

Yes, you read that right. A BAN. A Kat-wa you may say*. People are starting to take this waaaay to seriously.

For example- Matt on my facebook page. I make a casual comment about me being PM and he launches into a rant on MY page about liberal being the people's party and how they should lead. Here's what I have to say:
a) do you know me? And that I am the most left wing person ever?
b) do you really think my page is the place for this? Uh, no.

And he is one of many people going on and on about this election. They are all getting way over the top. So no more discussing it, thinking about it, and especially no ore ranting about it. Ok?

Phew, glad I got that off my chest! In other news, not much else. Church was good today, assembly lunch. Lovely. And tomorrow tow girls form Aus coming to stay. Should be good.

Well, that's it. I'm knackered. See you all tomorrow :)

* No offense meant. Please don't put a fatwa on me.

What should I do today?

So, it's Saturday, and I have nothing to do. This is the crappy part about being in a new country with no close friends and no job. You wind up having a lot of spare time. I can't wait to start work, just so I can get out and meet new people. And I always thought I'd be so good at being unemployed. It's made worse by the fact that my flatmate has gone to Oxford for the weekend, leaving me aloooone, so I don't have anyone to force to hang out with me.

And I do need to get out of the house. Otherwise I'll obsessively check the election results, paint my nails, watch Skins (took a break to watch the entire third season of gossip girl) and eat. And I'm very concerned that I'll get proper fat from this.

So! Ideas! I have compiled a short list. Please phone in with your vote!

1) Go to Camden and get my ear pierced
2) Go to Hyde park and wander around people watching.
3) Go to one of the museums I have not yet been to
4) Go to the pub, even though it's 10 am
5) Dress up in a crazy costume and see if tourists will give me money

So, what do you all think? Please text in "1" for option 1, "2" for option 2, "banana" for option 3, "5" for option 4 and "bah" for option 5. Voting closes in five minutes.

Drama, drama, drama

Maybe I have been watching too much facebook. Maybe I am being overly critical of others. But why do people keep adding drama to their lives unnecessarily? I don't know why. Because they are stupid I guess. Or maybe I am just socially inept, and that's why there is so little drama in my life.

But I swear, without mentioning specifics. I think people try to pick fights and make their own lives difficult, when they could just GO WITH THE FLOW and be happy. Save up all the rage for the things that are important.

That's my advice for the day. Other than that.... Watching the football (soccer). Seems to be a good match, though I can't really tell. I am just chilling out, having a very relaxing (means lazy) week. Next week some girls form Aus are coming to stay and then the week after..... I start work! So I am trying to squeeze all my laziness into a few days. It's hard work I tell you. But someone has to do it.

Feeling very random and blah tonight. I think the moral is not to mix dorito's and hot chocolate. There! Another piece of stellar advice!! I'm on fire tonight.

I'll try and do something crazy over the next few days so I have something to write about.

Huh. I just worked it out. Why people add unnecessary and stupid drama to their lives. IT'S SO THEY HAVE SOMETHING TO WRITE ON THIER BLOGS. What an epiphany!

Good night and good luck darlings.

The Backlash

Yeah, there has been some backlash after the big reveal yesterday. Mostly from my mother, who called me to tell me she was quite bothered that I shaped my life and moved across the world based on a dream that I had. Am I now, she seemed to want to know, going to also join a circus because I had a dream about?

The answer is: probably not. It would have to be a hell of a dream. Anyway, my addiction to skins is ongoing, and I am watching it now. While typing this. Can you believe that Tony got hit by a bus? Sorry. Should have written spoiler alert there.

Anyway, not much else. Not motivated to write right now as I am trying to find out hat the next phase of the Sid/Michelle/Tony love triangle is. And I'm wishing Tony would get a new duvet cover. Those of you who have seen it will agree with this.

Until tomorrow friends, family. Xox, Kathryn

My Secret

Readers, it's quite late, although not too late, and I have just gotten in from a fantastic evening with my church friends, we went to dinner to celebrate a birthday and I laughed so hard I now have a stomach ache.

Maybe it's because I am in such a mirthful mood, and because secrets are on my mind (an aside- JUDITH IF YOU ARE READING THIS, TELL ME THE SECRET), or maybe it's just because I'm tired and not thinking straight (extra typos all round), but I have decided to tell you all My Secret, which I have not told anyone yet. Not my parents, my sister, my friends, no one.

The Secret it the Real Reason I moved to London.

Ever since I announced that I was moving, I have been hounded by this question. Why are you moving to London? To do my Masters, I reply. But, they persist, why move to London to do it? Why not do it in Australia? And then I usually natter on about the better quality degree and getting an international qualification. All of which is true. But is not the Real Reason I decided to come to London and do my Masters.

This is the Real Reason.

(maybe I should wait to reveal all until tomorrow? Build the suspense? No, I can't really be bothered).

It was November of last year, and I was still trying to decide what to do After Uni. I was toying with the idea of moving overseas and working, or looking for a job at home, but I wasn't really considering doing any further study. Then, one fateful night, I had a dream that I was living in London, working at a pub and studying my Masters, having the best time ever, loving life, and being fabulous generally.

The next morning, I woke up and thought, that seems kind of awesome. So, I looked online at the only uni in London I had heard of, and applied, thinking I probably won't get in, or I probably won't go even if I do. I'll probably just stay in Perth and get a job. And now here I am, less than a year later, about to start my degree, about to start working in a pub, and living in central-ish London. All because of a dream I had last November which seemed cool.

It;s weird how things work out, hey.

BTW- Tabio tights rock my world.

Addiction

So I admit it. I'm completely addicted to Skins. Watching the entire first season as we speak, so I expect my typos will be worse than usual. Can't believe that Tony is that kid from About a Boy. Also can't believe what a prat Tony is. Michelle can do so much better.

Anyway, good weekend, hanging out with the church people. Conquered at Trivial Pursuit, by which I mean I came third or fourth. Numbers aren't important. Conquering is in the mind. Someone should have pointed that out to Napoleon.

Anyway, nothing very exciting planned for the week. Don't start work for two weeks so plenty of time to chill. Thinking about going to Berlin or Paris for a few days, just cos. Or maybe I'll do something really crazy :)

Well this has been a quick update, mainly for those of you who I know read this at work. Don't deny it, I know how disappointed you would have been if I hadn't put these few lines up.

Topic of the day: how early do you need to get to an airport? Three hours? Four? Two? I vote zero. Hire your own jet people. And then you can get there whenever the bloody hell you like. That one's for you, Australian Tourism Bureau. The slogan had to catch on eventually.

Xoxo, Kathryn

Bermondsey is the new Hoxton, ok?

Good news, faithful blog readers! I am now an employed Australian in London. Like so many others of my kind, I have gotten a job in- you guessed it- a pub. I don't evens tart until the 31st of August, so I am very excited about two weeks of actually enjoying my unemployment, rather than feeling like a boil on the face of society.

I have to say that I am shocked, as I didn't think that my interview went all that well. Partly, because it was in a crowded room with someone being interviewed right next to me, and partly because there were about sixty other people there being interviewed. But hey- the old Kathryn Charm, remember?

The man interviewing me asked where I was living and I said "Bermondsey" which earned me this response:

"Urgh! Bermondsey! I hate it there! It's sooo dodgy!"

Not so according to the guide book. According to that, Bermondsey is the new Hoxton. Not knowing where or what Hoxton is, I can only assume this is a good thing. Lucky I didn't mention that I live very close to the Old Kent Road.

But yes, it's very exciting, now I am employed I can stop worrying, and all of you who are in London can come and see me and give me an enormous fifty percent tip. Cash only guys. I don't take card.

Hunting season begins

That's right everyone, my annual hunt has begun. And I'd like to invite all of you to embark on this adventure with me.

From the same person who bought you "The 2009 Shorts Odyssey" and "Where'd you get that dress 2008", not to mention "2007's Search for Non-Fluro", I present to you all:

Boot Quest 2010: Beyond Biker Boots.

That's right, I am kicking off (pun definitely intended) a new shopping hunt, something which will consume my considerable research and hunting skill, and hopefully will, at its conclusion, see me wandering the streets in the perfect pair of mid calf, waterproof, black, flat, not-too-tight-on-the-calf, tough but not butch biker boots. If anyone has any leads, please contact the hotline.

In other news.... I have decided on a new career. I read in the paper about Town Crier War going on in the Cotswolds, where one town crier starting edging in on another one's patch. My response? They are both old guys in weird costumes. It's time to pass the three cornered hat on to the next generation (ie, me). I'm wondering how much something like that pays. Though neither of them looked homeless. I could also be a 21st Century crier, complete with iPhone app which screams "Hear ye, Hear ye" in my voice whenever you get a text. I'm full of awesome ideas.

I have a job interview tonight and I am quaking in my metaphorical boots (my actual boots still being somewhere out there, in the ether) because I really want this job. In my life, really wanting something tend sot translate to not getting it (see the tragic outcome of "The 2009 Shorts Odyssey"). But fingers crossed!!

Have a fab day readers. I hope its not raining wherever you are, because it is raining here.

Things which have annoyed me today

1) Naomi Campbell. Seriously? It's inconvenient to give evidence at the Hague? What's really inconvenient is having your heart cut out and eaten by a dictator. Have a heart Naomi. It concerns me that she is a person of note in our society.

2) The wat the voice over on the tube says "Wilesden Green". Too much emphasis on the first three letter lady. It sounds ridiculous.

3) Insane weather. Sunny or overcast? Make up your mind please.

4) My internet running out. Come on.

Hmm, so now that I got that off my chest.... I feel better. I am chilling eating minties right now, sent by my beloved mother, and the big news is that, after about 10 years, they have CHANGED THE PICTURES ON THEM. You know when you eat Minties, and they have the little drawings with the caption "it's moments like these you need... Minties"? Well, that has changed. The pictures are new. I don't know if I will be able to adjust to this unexpected change. I feel like the world have been moved. I can't handle it. I know what will cheer me up!!

Another mintie.

In other news, not much. Job interview tomorrow.... I actually want this one, so I will probably not get it. Fingers crossed though. I will be at my most charming, so what can go wrong??

Real action or re-election. YOU decide.

So, I voted. Yep, I went down to Australia House (turns out it's on the Strand) and voted. And even here there were people handing out fliers and telling me to vote for whoever. Seriously, are these volunteers? Or have the parties flown them in?

Also, did you know that these is a party called "The Climate Sceptics"? Who are these people?

So I engaged in the democratic process and I have to say, it was anti-climactic. Although Australia House is worth faking an international incident to get a look at.

In other news.... I have a job interview for Thursday! Yep, it's for a new pub that's opening in Bishopsgate so fingers crossed.

I have also been told that I need to start checking the spelling and grammar on my blog, and having looked over the last few entries, there are a few small typos. But really. Is it my fault that my thoughts flow too fast for my fingers to keep up with? These typos are the mark of my genius. Nothing more.

Best quote of the week: (from a review of Neighbours) ".... and Toadie, who seems to run the entire Australian legal system without ever opening a book..." so so true.

Things on my mind, right here, right now

I just found a mango. Right here, on the table. Where's it from? HO old is it? Can I eat it? WIll Jo (the flat mate) care? Hmm.

Why did the guy delivering my package buzz right at the moment when I got out of the shower, and i was naked with crazy, freshly washed hair? Hmm? Could he not have waited five more minutes?

Why am I one pound short for the coffee I want to buy from Starbucks? So now my choices are take cash out or skip the coffee. Which to do?

Why is my mum not skyping me now at a time which is convenient for me? What, does she have a life outside of me or something? (Realisation dawns) Oh no!

Cups of tea make you think. Which is lovely. Mmm, cup of tea.

I want to fast forward thee months into the future, by which point, I assume, I will have a job, be going to uni, have made some more friends, or be closer to the ones I have now.... but the next three months will suck. Re-establishing yourself into life alone? Adventure? It's not all it's cracked up to be. It;s hard work (I can see why I've been avoiding it all these years). And sometimes, you can get melancholy about that.

And then you find a mango on the table. Out of no where. And everything seems good again.

I don't even care if it's Jo's. I'm eating it.

Awesome :)

A-maze me, Trafalgar Square

Yes, there's a maze in the middle of Trafalgar Square. Yes, it's maybe the awesomeest thing ever. And yes, I got lost in it. It's up for a week and today is the last day and I made it. It was very cool, with street signs in it and little pieces of information about the streets (did you know that Sherlock Holmes and Watson met in Piccadilly Circus?) and I did eventually find my way out. Probably the coolest free thing I have ever done.

As I walked away from the maze, still triumphant from finding my way out to safety, I headed down Piccadilly towards the Green Park station. I was walking up towards the Ritz when I had my FIRST CELEBRITY SIGHTING. This is very exciting, because I have NEVER seen a celebrity in my life. Here's what happened:

I was walking down the street when I saw a man passing me who looked very familiar. I looked closer and saw.... it was Bill Nighy!! (off Love Actually and The Boat That Rocked) (this does count as a celebrity sighting, I don;t care what you say). I was so excited. I managed to stay cool and not stop and scream. But it was tough I tell you.

Laugh all you want faithful readers. But would you casually wander past Bill Nighy in Perth? I think not friends. Awesome!!

The Art of Stalking

So I have finally found someone who goes through art galleries at the same pace as me. After years of searching, and having to slow down or speed up or lose my buddy entirely, I have found someone who moves at my pace, skipping the same paintings, spending time on the same paintings, leaning against the wall texting at the same time. It's the perfect relationship. The only problem? This person is a stranger. So I think that I am now a stalker.

I was at the Tate Modern. (An aside- I love modern art. Even the weird kind that makes no sense and could have been done by your five year old nephew. That's not the point. The point is that it's an expression of the darkness in someone's soul. I always feel so well adjusted when I view modern art. And Salvador Dali is a god to me.) So, I'm at the Tate Modern. Wandering up to the fifth floor when I nearly slammed into a guy exiting the bathroom. I think nothing of it and keep walking. He enters the gallery. I enter immediately after him. And that was when it began. We walked around the opposite sides of the galleries and met in the middle, crossed over and finished at the same time. Even when I tried to lose him, he found me. I left the video of the naked woman pouring blood over herself and rolling in feathers early so that I could lose him and look like less of a stalker. But he caught up with me at the statue staring into the pile of second hand clothes. And I felt like a stalker. Because he usually left the galleries a step ahead of me. I wanted to stop and scream "I AM NOT FOLLOWING YOU FELLOW ART LVOER!! I AM MERELY ENJOYING ART AT THE SAME PACE AS YOU, A STEP BEHIND ME". A curse it was.

He was quite sexy though, so it wasn't too bad of a view following him around.

After that I wandered across the Millenium Bridge and up to St Paul's Cathedral then down Fleet St and the Strand before jumping on the train at Charing Cross station. A lovely day all up :)

Call me crazy but....

Five channels of sport seems insane. I'm just saying. Who would pay for that? That's all I have to say to Sky Sports about that.

Anyway, not much to say.... On the job front, was offered a job yesterday (yay!) but turned it down as it was six days of work and not nearly enough pay. Like, I would barely be breaking even. So I had to say no. Thinking I might take a few days of not applying for jobs. I need a break. It's making me crazy. I am sick of job sites! So tomorrow, I'm going to go to the Tate Modern, Trafalgar Square and Starbucks, and chill. NO job worries.

Here is a list ofr those of you who enjoy them (which is no one):

How To Spot An Australian in London:

1) They are wearing jeans and jumpers in "summer" when everyone else is wearing shorts.
2) They sit up looking startled and say "Where am I? Where am I?" at the end of Home and Away when the Channel 7 logo pops up.
3) They insist on referring to crisps as chips.
4) They are in Tesco's for half an hour, staring at the self service checkout, trying to find "capsicum" on the veggie list.
5) They call football soccer.

That's all I can think of now. It was raining today on Oxford Street. It was hell. That place is bad enough without the added inconvenience of rain. Seriously, I nearly got killed by umbrella's. The worst part is where people stand next to you, holding their umbrella's so that the droplets roll off it onto your head. Gah!

Jobs, and all that

Faithful readers of this blog will know that I am, at present Unemployed and Actively Seeking Work (as my Monster.co.uk profile says). Being unemployed is quite possibly the worst thing I have ever experienced. You have no where to go, nothing to do, no way of meeting new people.... you sit at home behind your computer doing applications and watching My Super Sweet 16 over and over again (omg, did anyone see the ep with that guy Andre. What. A. Loser!! I was all, you aint working the fro!)

Anyway, I have applied for approximately 100, 000, 000 jobs (no hyperbole here) which probably translates to between forty and fifty. I have had one interview with a nannying agency (thanks, but no thanks, they said) and I have an interview this afternoon for a charity fundraiser. I did get an interview to work at a club, and I was going to go for that because it sounded like a good job, good hours, decent pay. And then I googled the club.

Yes. It's a gentleman's club.

You know you have been unemployed too long when you are tempted. Part of me is thinking, hmm, great tips! While the words "morally repugnant" spin through my head. So int he end, I decided not to go, but to hold that one in reserve for later on. When I am truly desperate. Like, when I've seen every episode of My Super Sweet 16 four times or more. So, sometime next week.

Laundry Day, The Greatest of Days

Yes, that's right, my laundry has gotten to the point where I know have had to set aside a day to take care of it. Seriously, where is the laundry fairy who took care of this when I lived at home?? Hmm? Where you at, laundry fairy?

Anyway, little to mention. Flatmates are moving out today and I get a new one, who I have met and she seems cool. The flat is suspiciously tidy in preparation for their departure, and I scored a bottle of ouzo and a tiny bit of gin so I am well pleased. I have a job interview tomorrow. Here is my script:

"I work well in teams, enjoy new challenges, always give 110% to a role, am very hard working, enthusiastic and reliable!" Accompanied by a sparkling smile. At least my clothes will be clean.

Thought for the day: Why do so many people get so worried about so many things which, at the end of the day, don't matter? And I include myself in this. Just the other day, I was watching TV and My Super Sweet Sixteen came on, and it was a repeat. I mean, they had shown THE SAME EPISODE just three days earlier. Really E4, what are you doing? And in retrospect, that may have been a waste of my energy, being annoyed about that. So form now on, I'm saving all my anger for what's important. Like the fact that Home and Away is about to go off screen for a few months. I mean, what's that about anyway?

I'll try and think of a better thought for the day tomorrow.

Steven K. Amos, I love you

Faithful blog followers, good morning! I hope you all slept well.

Went to comedy last night- Edinburgh previews (do I actually need to go to Edinburgh if I've seen all the previews? I wonder) and saw Steven K. Amos and some guy called Carey. It was HILARIOUS. I think my abs are a little tighter from all the laughing. I went down with Katie and Nick (who, I hope, are reading this and feeling like celebrities because they have been mentioned on my critically acclaimed blog), and I must say, I don't know who's idea it was (that's code for, it wasn't mine, but I wish I could take credit for it) but it was a brilliant idea. 10 pounds for some epic comedy. Love. SKA is one of my fave comedians anyway, so it was an awesome night all up.

Took a taxi home (unexpected expense, ok- i missed the last train and couldn't be bothered taking the bus) and finally got my first taste of "The Knowledge" which as far as I can tell means that they know every single street name in London. I get into the cab and tell him my street name, and he immediately says "End near the tube station love?" I could not believe it! How did he know immediately where my street was? And how long it was? And where the tube station was in proximity to my street? WTF??

Anyway, that was my very exciting night. There were a dozen other things I was going to write on here which I've now forgotten. I got a job interview (rejoice!), so that's a bit fun. And my brother's pregnant. Well, his wife is. Otherwise I'm sure you would have all heard about it on Oprah. So you can all call me Auntie Countess Kat. Awesome.

Sausage

I have noticed an alarming trend which I would like to share with the community at large: "Sausage". Recently, I was on the street, unlocking the door, when a man rode past on a bike and yelled out something that sounded exactly like "Sausage!!!" I turned around, and he's grinning at me as he rides away, and I'm like what??? So I asked my flatmates if this meant anything and after initially telling me it meant "lardass" they conceded that it didn't actually mean anything as far as they knew. I puzzled over this, but eventually let it go.

Then yesterday, I'm walking down the street, and someone yells something out of a van at me, and I swear he said "sausage" too. So I have come up with two possible solutions: Either
a) Sausage means something that I don't know about (in which case, someone please tell me) or
b) I have become paranoid about this and now all I can hear is the word "sausage".

Anyway, I am very confused now. What is this sausage thing?

But here are the things that have made me smile in the last 24 hours:

1) Watching Paris Hilton's New BFF. At the TTYN ceremony (Talk to Ya Never!) one of the potential BFF"s started swearing at Paris and told her she "wasn't as nice as people thought". Loves it!

2) Kim Kardashian taking her mum to her Playboy shoot.

3) One of the ads on the underground is for a plastic surgeon, and it has a picture of a smiling woman with enormous breasts and the slogan "When a push up bra just isn't enough, get a boob job!" or something to that effect. Someone had stuck a sticker on it which read "You don't need this. You are perfect just the way you are". Heart.

4) Tube or false with TFL: http://www.tfl.gov.uk/tfl/corporate/modesoftransport/tube/history/

That's pretty much it for now peeps. Keep listening for sausages!!

Sun, Sun, Sun

It's sunny today!! Can't quite believe it. It is pouring in through the windows, inviting me, tempting me to go out. I think I shall allow myself to be tempted. But first! A word to my fans....

All is well here. I'm bored, and I can't quite work out how people handle unemployment. I think I only have a few more days before I become destructively bored. You know, like, I have nothing to do so I'm going to dye my hair. Or, I have nothing to do so I'm going to book a flight to Paris. Hmm, actually....

Anyway, Katie and Nick are in town, and last night we went to a very cool restaurant which was in a converted bus. We sat on the top floor and I'm glad I'm not taller. But it was very cool, uncomfortably romantic and the food was great. (All vegan). And of course, Katie has given us our new Quote of the Week:

"If it's funnier than the truth, then it's not a lie."

Words to live by friends. Words to live by.

I also went running yesterday. My legs are a tad sore now. But i am feeling very good about myself and eating the rest of the Ben and Jerry's Fairtrade Chocolate Fudge Brownie icecream.

Also! Blog feedback! Rikki (I knew you would be reading this blog Rikki- I knew it would cheer you up) is concerned that I don't sound cheerful enough and is worried I'm not having a good time, so I want to assure everyone that I am having an awesome, epic, if slightly bored time. Seriously, how do people handle unemployment? Suggestions?

Anyway, signing off, until next time friends.

Love Kat

Covent Garden, Job Applications and that big thing called the Sky

I lied yesterday, and I apologise though it was unintentional. I didn't go to Camden, I went to Covent Garden, after getting word that there was an AUstralian food shop there. And lo and behold there was! I got 8 redskins for 2 pounds. Shocking, but the taste of redskins was worth any amount. For anyone who's interested, it's at 3 Garrick St, Covent Garden, and it's called Cybercandy or something. Cyber something for sure.

Yesterday I noticed that buskers here are actually good. Talented. This shocked me, though not enough to give them any money. There was a man playing sax in the tube station, and he was quite amazing. But that said, once I was on a train and a man started playing a recorder. A RECORDER! And I couldn't get off the train. I wanted to pay him to stop but my pride prevented me, so I turned my ipod up.... and up..... and up......

I am currently up to my eyeballs in job applications. Every person in this city will know who I am, that I'm desperate for a job and that I'm a real team player before long. How painful. To distract myself, I took a walk and discovered that I am only twenty minutes walk from Tower Bridge. And right across the bridge is the Tower of London. That's pretty. Damn. Cool.

You know where you get if you walk twenty minutes in Perth? Nowhere.

Anyway, I'm am missing you all. Come and visit me soon please. We can walk to Tower Bridge and then get some redskins. Awesome.

London calling.... but my connection not very good

So, I am writing a blog, which, if we think seriously about it, is the ultimate in self indulgence. Here I am, writing in the hopes that some of you will read this and be interested, when in fact you all probably have better things to do. However, in the hopes that you don't, I will strive on....

As most of you know, I recently relocated to London from the (usually) sunny shores of Australia. Have been here for exactly one month now, holidaying with my parents who left today. I was very sad, not only that they were leaving me here, alone in this cold grey city, but also that now I would need to start preparing food for myself.

I am living in a little flat in Southwark, which featured on a documentary last night about stabbing related deaths. Loving it. But it's central, it's quiet, and so a little stabbing is a small price to pay.

Anyway, for those of you who can be bothered, I have written a highly informative list of Things I Have Learned About London. Enjoy!

Things I Have Learned About London:

1) "Summer" is a lie. (It's raining).

2) Tube drivers are mildly passive agressive. "There are four doors on this train. Maybe use them all." and "Stop holding the doors open. You're damaging the train. I mean it. Stop."

3) You can wear pretty much anything, anytime, anywhere and no one will bat an eyelid.

4) Push or be pushed. No one cares that you are smaller than them.

5) The Queen isn't out chilling in the Park with the people.

6) Newspapers are free!!!!!!!!

7) Everything else is expensive.

Anyway, that's all for now. I am going to go and kick back with a book then maybe head up to Camden. Awesome.

Love Kat.